A year in review

 This is going to be a marathon post. It's New Year's Eve and I thought the best way to capture 2011 would be to do a picture highlight from each month. But it's so hard to choose just one. So, naturally there are more. And here is why I chose each one. Starting with January and this cute babe of mine. He turned one. I know, the shirt's a dead giveaway. But this year of one has been so very good. He has been a joy. People say this all the time. I mean it. He is such a pure joy to be around. He is sweet and silly and funny and kind and smart. All these things. I have loved this year with him.

 This is my favorite picture of the year. If only Jeff were in it with us. Look at all of my cute kids. Their faces make me want to melt. This was my birthday dinner at Rodizio. And there we are, all cheesing it up. And those faces. Seriously. Happy birthday momma.

 This picture was taken on Jeff's birthday in February. My mom was in town and Michael came over for cake and ice cream. This is one of the last pictures I have of him. And it is with my mom. And I love it.

And here is my Jeff on his birthday. All of the kids drew pictures for him, those are the best kind of presents. Love that boy of mine. Both of them. But the tall one. He still gets me every time. 

 March found us at Brian Head with Jeff's brother and his family. I have not been skiing since I was 12. I tried to snowboard all through my teenage years. Even in college. I totally sucked. And then we went skiing here and I fell in love. Seriously. Skiing could possibly be one of my favorite things ever. And this trip was so much fun.

Both of my nieces have birthdays in March, a day apart. They came over and celebrated with us. It was the last time they saw their dad. And this picture is how I will remember my brother. Sitting on my couch, kids climbing all over him, playing games on his phone. An almost smile on  his face, the kind that said how happy he was to be with those kids he loved.

 Paige turned four in April. She had the best birthday party. A Wonderland tea party with all of her cute friends in their fanciest fancies. It turned out exactly how I had imagined. And she loved it.

 April was the month my brother died. April. How can it be so close and seem so far away? That whole time surrounding his death seems surreal. Did it really happen? Someday I will get used to this idea, that he is gone. Right now it still surprises me, catches me off guard and makes me cry. And I miss him. Oh, how I miss him. 

 In May we went to California and stayed in Newport. The hotel was amazing. We spent time at the pool and at the beach and at Disneyland and Knotts Berry Farm. It was probably my favorite vacation of the year.

 In June we went on Pioneer Trek with our stake. We were on the food committee and helped plan and prepare all the meals. It was fun and stressful and tiring. And Jeff looks way better as a pioneer than I do. For real. So I will spare you all the details and just say that big boobs and pioneer dresses are a really bad combo.

 Fourth of July was one of my favorite days. Here we are on the slip and slide. So. Much. Fun.

 And then the fireworks show at night. Gathered around with a bunch of our favorite friends. Summer perfection.

 Is this vain? Probably yes, but I don't care. In August my friend Emily gave me a fab new haircut. Color and layers and even some bangs in there. I loved it. And I felt so pretty. And August marked just over a year that I had started my weight loss adventure. At this point I had lost 45 pounds. It all kind of came together for me this summer. And these pictures reflect that. Me, feeling good about myself. And that is a nice place to be.  

 September was our last trip to Disneyland before our passes ran out. We had a great time. The boys were off track and we went with my mom and dad and stayed in a hotel right by the park. Such fun.

 October has to be my favorite month. I love our house full of spooky decorations and the kids in their costumes and the pumpkin patch and all of our fun traditions. October just makes me happy.

 October was also the month we got our family pictures. They turned out lovely. This is my favorite one of Brooks.

 More Fall happiness. We went to Oregon at the beginning of October and ran around all over the place. The beach, Multnomah Falls, Saturday Market, the mall, downtown. We hit all my favorites. And I love being home with my mom and dad. Another great trip.

 The Santa Claus we visited this year was a bit of an angry elf. Even the kids noticed. I thought it was funny. And this picture is even more funny. I  love Owen's face.

 December was full of family. All of our immediate family came and stayed with us for Christmas. I thought it was going to be crazy. And it was, but in a nice way. We all got along and the kids played and we were a loud happy bunch. This is the entire Blackmun clan at Hardware Ranch on Christmas Eve morning. Fun times.

This is our little Bowman fam at Paige's pre-school program. It was darling. And I was so happy my mom and dad could be there with us.

That is our year. Full of ups and downs and everything in between. I have to admit that it was one of the hardest years I have had. Losing my brother was inexplicably sad. Still. Jeff says that I will get used to it and he knows. But I am not so sure. To lose someone that feels so much a part of you is such a strange thing. But it happens to people everyday. And they go on living happy lives. And we have too. And I feel like I have grown up a little, started seeing things though different eyes. And that is not a bad thing. It is just a life thing. One of many I will go through along this journey of mine. And there is so much goodness along the way too. That is what stands out to me. All the sweetness life has to offer. So that is what I will remember about this year. So long, 2011.